eeks.

Soooo.

Things are good then bad. 

College is awesome, i'm acing everything (:

Things with the le bf, or w.e he is, idk, they are getting there. Somethings went down badly, and just yeah, hopefully thats all sorted now.

I'm annoyed cause some girl owes me money from like 4 months ago when she really needed it, but now when i need it, she STILL cant give it back to me.

Last week my grandad had a heart attack, was in hospital and on wednesday evening he passed.

His funeral is tomorrow. 

Stuff with work is shit, cause they were really inconsiderate about me having time off for the funeral, and saying it was an inconvenience. well sorry. im sure he didnt plan it. fuck sake.

erm so i guess the main new thing is that i am actually completely infatuated with my film teacher.

and i'll be honest. i don't think it's 100% unrequited, but then that could just be wishful thinking.

Reasons it is not unrequited.

1. He repeatedly says im cool.

2. He says he likes my hair. this has also been repeated.

3. We talk about stuff like that he was in a band, and stuff non associated with school

4. When we were talking about videos and such, he forgot and then said i should email him or send a message on facebook with the links. AND then messaged me back like straight away, once again saying i was cool. WITH A SMILEY FACE

5. He says i am good at film. To other teachers i dont even have.

6. He said he will take me to the secret smoking area. FOR TEACHERS.

Reason it is unrequited.

1. He is my film teacher and i am his student. 

2. hmmmm

This is very bad, like really bad, cause even if he wasnt my teacher, id still like him, i get butterflies for godsake. like REAL bad. right now as a matter of fact.

:'(

what do i doooo..

ANYWAYS im sure this will pass.

hopefully.

Dont know what to do with myself right now. i have no work to do. sam i guess is still asleep.

we were meant to go to the cinema and then last night saying he has a free house and we should maybe watch a film there. but i really wanted to go out, act normal for once, and i am so sure if we stay in, his friends will come round and start smoking and im just sick of it now. 

well i better be off out now i wanna get some hair dye and possibly something for the funeral.

isabella. x